Jumper (2008) & Push (2009)

Jumper & Push

Film reviews by: Witney Seibold

I’m a teetotaler, so I must do things like watch Doug Liman’s “Jumper” (2008) and Paul McGuigan’s “Push” (2009) back-to-back to stretch myself to new extremes. I was hoping for an experience delirious and silly. Indeed that was what I got, but the films’ combined power did not get me as high as I had hoped.

Thirst

Thirst

Film review by: Witney Seibold

 

Park Chan-Wook begins his new vampire movie “Thirst” with an intense philosophical promise, and then allows it to peter out into a melodramatic grand guignol of twisted domesticity. Taken by themselves, the two separate halves are amazing. Together, the film is a little mismatched and disappointing.

The Men Who Stare at Goats

The Men Who Stare at Goats

Film review by: Witney Seibold

 

While first-time feature director Grant Heslov’s film “The Men Who Stare at Goats” begins with the captioned bit o’ Godardian trickery “More of this is true than you would believe,” the film is not as playful as it could have been. Not as much as, say, Charlie Kaufman could have made it, at any rate. That’s not to say that it’s not a quickly-paced, light-hearted amusing film.

Zombieland

Zombieland

Film review by: Witney Seibold

 

A warning: I will discuss a plot point about this film’s ending. It’s a minor point, but could still be seen as a “spoiler” to some. For the most part, though, I will keep the film’s surprises a secret.

Michael Jackson’s This is It

Michael Jackson’s This is It

Film review by: Witney Seibold

 

I felt the same way you did. Surely, I felt, this documentary, compiled of rehearsal footage of Michael Jackson’s announced final tour, would be an exploitation; a cynical way to recoup the losses of Jackson’s untimely death. It would be a way to exploit the celebrity death cult and turn Jackson’s mere lionization into an outright sainthood. Would there be any possible way, I asked myself, to make a film, so soon on the heels of Jackson’s death, the least bit tasteful?

Stacy (2001)

Stacy (2001)

Film review by: Witney Seibold

 

Be sure the read the essay that comes enclosed with your video of Naoyuki Tomomatsu’s “Stacy.” It explains the Japanese concept of “moé.” Moé can be described as the passionate sexual obsession that adult males hold for the ultra-cute, non-existant fantasy schoolgirls often seen in manga and anime. It is moé that has grown men buying used underpants from vending machines. Watch some of the non-porn work of AV idol Sora Aoi, or Satoshi Kon’s brilliant anime “Perfect Blue” to get a more powerful illustration of this.

King Frat (1979)

King Frat (1979)

Film review by: Witney Seibold

 

In 1979, in the wake of the success of “Animal House,” came a similar frat-boy raunch film that dispensed with John Landis’ cogency, sympathy, decency, and good taste.

Bronson

Bronson

Film review by: Witney Seibold

 

Like his fictional progenitor Alex DeLarge before him, real-life British criminal Michael Peterson seems unable to commit acts of gentleness; he is driven by an instinctual, humorous, animal need to start fistfights, smash faces, break knees, and generally be as violent as he can be. He is not necessarily an angry fellow, often smiling his way through his fights. That he looks like a 1920s circus strongman – complete with bald head and comically large handlebar moustache – only adds to the surreal humor of his violence.

Antichrist

Antichrist

Film review by: Witney Seibold

 

I think the handle one needs to understand Lars von Trier’s new provocation “Antichrist,” is to realize that he was suffering from severe depression while making it. In interviews, von Trier has said that he made “Antichrist” as a form of (ultimately unsuccessful) therapy, and all the horrific concepts and images in his film spring from that struggle.

Psycho

Oh God! Mother!

Film essay by: Witney Seibold

Warning: If you have not seen Alfred Hitchcock’s “Psycho,” and are unfamiliar with the story, do not read this essay. Most people are familiar with the plot twists at this point, so I feel fine discussing them openly. If you do not know the twists… well, first of all, it’s o.k. to come out from under that rock now, but also the twists should remain a surprise.