Repo Chick

Repo Chick

Film review by: Witney Seibold

Alex Cox‘s gorgeously bugnuts punkrock 1984 sci-fi odyssey “Repo Man” entered my life at a late date. I was 30 by the time I saw it for the first time, and I loved it so much, I began to regret not having seen it at age 18, when it could have carried a great deal of my teenage sensibilities. But I did see it, and I’m glad to have done so. It sparked a marathon of Cox’s other films, and I became familiar with this stellar/mad mind, and was given a another cult password to whisper quietly to other initiates.

Schoolgirl Report, volume #7: What the Heart Must Thereby… (1974)

Schoolgirl Report, volume #7: What the Heart Must Thereby… (1974)

Film review by: Witney Seibold

It answers all the lingering questions from parts 1-6. Yuk yuk.

Scandalous Gilda

Scandalous Gilda (1985)

Film review by: Witney Seibold

No one does goofy softcore smut like Italy. “Scandalous Gilda,” directed by Gabriele Lavia, starts out as a goofy softcore romp, though, and even includes a playful animated sequence (with certain parts of the human anatomy talking and laughing and living independently of their human bodies), and quickly descends into a horrifying pit of sexual terror. In short, it’s not fun.

House (1977)

House (1977)

Film review by: Witney Seibold

How do I describe Nobuhiko Obayashi’s 1977 freakout film “House” to the uninitiated? Heck, how do I describe it to cult film veterans?

Big Money Rustlas

Big Money Rustlas

Film review by: Witney Seibold

The Insane Clown Posse is a baffling phenomenon. Based out of Detroit, they are a horrorcore rap group of white men who wear garish, frightening clown makeup, espouse the typical gangsta criminal lifestyle (often singing about rape and murder), and, as was recently revealed, are vitriolically anti-intellectual, and even claim to be Pentecostal Christians posing as popular entertainment.

Standing Ovation

Standing Ovation

Film review by: Witney Seibold

 It’s difficult for me to describe “Standing Ovation” to the uninitiated.

The Series Project: The Cremaster Cycle

  The Series Project: The Cremaster Cycle

Film essay by: Witney Seibold

 Ah yes. Matthew Barney‘s epic Cremaster Cycle. Part artistic powerhouse, part surrealist tour-de-force, part impenetrable mindgame, and often considered Barney’s own self-indulgent, pretentious ego trip, The Cremaster Cycle is, it cannot be denied, a unique force in the world of art and a notable footnote in the world of cinema.

Dragon Hunt (1990)

 Dragon Hunt

Film review by: Witney Seibold

 A pair of Canadian, kung-fu expert, identical twins, Martin and Michael McNamara, once tried to break into the biz with a 1986 film called “Twin Dragon Encounter.” I have not seen “Twin Dragon Encounter,” but I did see the follow-up film “Dragon Hunt” made in 1990 by director Charles Wiener. It’s not much of a wonder why they didn’t make a bigger splash, as “Dragon Hunt” is one of those films that is so inept, so strange, so badly written, and incompetently directed that it becomes somewhat glorious.

The Strangeness (1980)

 The Strangeness (1980)

Film review by: Witney Seibold

 There are more tactful ways to put this, but I think that glib is more succinct: The monster looks like a vagina.

C Me Dance

C Me Dance

Film review by: Witney Seibold

I will start with a succinct line of dialogue from the TV series “King of the Hill” that pretty much sums up my own feelings on Christian rock: “You’re not making Christianity better, you’re making rock ‘n’ roll worse.”