Scream XXX: A Porn Parody

Scream XXX: A Porn Parody

film review by: Witney Seibold


I think the first big success in the current wave of porn parodies was “Not the Bradys XXX,” which was, at the time, a rather clever conceit. How many porn-fancying Gen-Xers, if they were honest with themselves, didn’t want to see Marcia and Jane getting it on? (more…)

Published in: on June 15, 2011 at 2:52 pm  Comments (3)  

20 Albums Every Geek Should Own

20 Albums Every Geek Should Own

Article by: Witney Seibold


In this article for Geekscape, I lament the waning power and significance of the Rock Snob in the echelons of geekery. I recall a time when record stores were the coolest crux of pop culture obsessives, and how rock ‘n’ roll scholars were at the top of the heap. In that spirit, I tried to think of ten records that geeks would love to get them back into the record stores, and enjoy weirdo music. That top-10 quickly became an epically long top-20. (more…)

Published in: on May 20, 2011 at 2:12 pm  Leave a Comment  

The Top-10 Self-Mutilations

The Top-10 Self-Mutilations

Article by: Witney Seibold


          Although I bothered to write a multiple-page essay on self-mutilations – and indeed this article is not for the squeamish – I want to assure my readers that I am not a cutter, nor am I suffering from depression. This article should stand, rather, as a spiritual brother to the article I recently published on the 10 most disgusting movies ever made; It’s more a further step in the (perhaps over-) enthused exploration of extreme cinema. (more…)

Published in: on May 16, 2011 at 9:01 pm  Leave a Comment  

The Top-10 Warriors of the Ancient World

The Top-10 Warriors of the Ancient World (in pop culture)

Article by: Witney Seibold


          I wrote this article the same weekend “Thor” was released in theaters. “Thor,” what with its theatrical bombast, and vague resemblance to the sci-fi/Dark Ages mash-ups from the 1980s, brought to mind such weird-ass fantasy epics as “Krull,” “Masters of the Universe,” and “Flash Gordon.” (more…)

Published in: on May 14, 2011 at 11:08 pm  Leave a Comment  

The People vs. George Lucas

The People vs. George Lucas

Film review by: Witney Seibold

I once wrote a brief article on how massive cult science fiction films like “Star Wars” seem to fulfill a religious need in the hearts of sci-fi fans, and how the release of “Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace” represented a crisis of faith for true believers. (more…)

Published in: on May 11, 2011 at 5:32 pm  Leave a Comment  

The Sins of Madame Bovary (1969)

The Sins of Madame Bovary

Film review by: Witney Seibold


I was astonished at how well Hans Schott-Schöbinger’s 1969 pseudo-erotic potboiler “The Sins of Madame Bovary” mirrored Gustave Flaubert’s 1856 masterpiece. (more…)

Published in: on May 11, 2011 at 12:00 am  Leave a Comment  

The Top-10 Greatest Unmade Movies

The Top-10 Greatest Unmade Movies

Article by: Witney Seibold


          Hollywood is rife with tragic tales of taken, altered, and unreleased dream projects. It’s a matter of pride, in fact, among cineastes, to collect and display information of great unmade movies. (more…)

Published in: on May 10, 2011 at 11:06 pm  Leave a Comment  

The Top-10 Most Disgusting Movies

The Top-10 Most Disgusting Movies

Article by: Witney Seibold

                It’s incredible the amount of blood and gore some horror hounds can tolerate. I myself was always drawn to horror films, even when I was of an age that they scared the hell out of me. After a while, I built up a tolerance for gore, and wasn’t as scared or grossed out by bloody mayhem. I’m sure many young horror nuts have a similar character arc. (more…)

Published in: on April 25, 2011 at 12:54 am  Leave a Comment  

Ten Outsider Auteurs

The Top-10 Outsider Auteurs

Article by: Witney Seibold 

          Some filmmakers are legitimate auteurs who make deeply personal and fascinating films with a strong sense of a style, and a personal philosophy that is fascinating to walk around in. Hollywood is full of stories about how some famous or unappreciated talent has been stymied by the system. This is not an article about those people or those stories. This is an article about the outsiders. The hard workers. The weirdos. The outsider auteurs. (more…)

Published in: on April 23, 2011 at 8:06 pm  Comments (1)  

Building a Better Critic: 10 Rules to be the Best Geek You Can Be

Building a Better Critic: 10 Rules to be the Best Geek You Can Be

Article by: Witney Seibold

A colleague of mine on recently wrote an article on how badly the modern internet denizen behaves. He accused young geeks of lambasting Zack Snyder’s recent action film “Sucker Punch” too harshly, even though it was replete with every last accoutrement of the sub-culture. His article was rife with a wrathful vitriol, and he did stand in angry accusation of his readers, but I did agree with his basic point: That geek teens have become a sarcastic lot of bullies. (more…)

Published in: on April 7, 2011 at 11:22 am  Comments (1)