Snakes on a Plane

Snakes on a Plane

Film review by: Witney Seibold


            “That guy saw us! I’m gonna put snakes on his plane!”

            And so the animated rabbits at so succinctly abbreviated the entire plot of “Snakes on a Plane.” But then, looking to a film entitled “Snakes on a Plane” for intricate plotting and oblique nuances is a churlish exercise, akin to looking inside a pound of ground hamburger for your lost puppy. “Snakes on a Plane” is as simple as the title implies. There are snakes, they are on a plane, Samuel L. Jackson matches has to match wits with the wily reptiles, alea iacta est.


            The advertisers behind “Snakes on a Plane” thought that the above elements were all they needed to market the picture to the public; A plain and literal title promising campy mayhem, combined with the presence of Jackson… well, the film practically sells itself. The film ended up developing an online advertising juggernaut months in advance. I even got an invitation to the film from Samuel L. Jackson himself, thanks to my buddy Chris discovering the “Choose What Samuel L. Jackson Says to Your Friends” feature from the “Snakes on a Plane” website.


            The film is obviously has not intensions of delivering any sort of realistic thrills, or true terrifying “Jaws”-like animal mayhem. No, it wants to be a cult film. A camp film. A midnight movie, if you will. So, on that basis, I will judge it.


            “Snakes in a Plane,” directed by David R. Ellis, is about a young man (Nathan Phillips) who witnesses some bad guys doing their dirty work shortly before said bad guys are arrested. Young man must testify at the bad guys’ trial and is flown to the trial site under the protection of policeman Neville Flynn (Jackson). Bad guys find which plane he’s on, spray a buncha snakes with pheromones to make them violent, and set them loose. 80 minutes later the plane lands, several people having been bitten. Um… That’s all.


            The filmmaking is competent enough, although I would have preferred that more real snakes were used, instead of the digital fakeouts slithering all over the screen. In the course of the film we see our herpetological brethren not only on a plane, but on a penis, on a breast, up a skirt, on a neck, in an eye, and swallowing a yuppie asshole. The film, reportedly, wasn’t violent or sexy enough, so some sequences of violence and nudity were added ex post facto. The film is violent enough to keep interest, and the nudity is always welcome in this prudish age. But still… “Snakes on a Plane” just doesn’t have the right kind of manic energy to elevate it to true cult status. It may not be a summer blockbuster, but SOAP still falls for the old mistake of most crappy summer shoot-‘em-ups: You can market it all you like, the film still has to be able to stand by itself. It’s a fun film, but kind of a letdown, especially after that motherfucking personalized invitation.


Snakes on a Boob

Snakes on a Boob

             On a personal note, I saw this film at a Sunday matinee with my girlfriend. The man sitting across the aisle from us was a schizophrenic who chattered to himself throughout the length of the film. Whenever a snake appeared onscreen, this man, who sounded like a cross between Gollum and Beavis, would enthusiastically and repeatedly growl the word “snake” for the entire theater to hear. His presence actually enhanced my cinema experience.

Published in: on December 21, 2007 at 3:03 am  Comments (1)  

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  1. 1962年、フェンディグループ採用、光栄ドイツ人デザイナー-カール・ラガーフェルド。彼スタイルを保持していますは、ハイパー現実的な非常に不健康な審美的な多くの場合を作成する社会的な論評。深い赤はすぐになった決定ファッションのいくつかの10年。–シャネル 財布

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